A few days ago I posted what I said would be my next-to-last post on the NFL spectacle, unless something else interesting happened. Well, guess what? Something else interesting happened! So this will be my next-to-last post, barring further idiocy. (Of course, that “barring further idiocy” could keep me posting on this for the next eon.)
More NFL goodness, a.k.a., the circus continues:
Hopeless idiot Colin Krapohead, or whatever his name is, is filing a grievance against the NFL because no one will hire him. Er, what’s the grievance? Who, exactly, is guilty of what? The word being used is “collusion,” as in, “Coaches are colluding against me!” The statement from Krapohead’s lawyer is “Trump sux! Legacy of slavery!” Yeah, seriously.
The “Trump sux” part: “athletes should not be denied employment based on partisan political provocation by the Executive Branch of our government.” Jesus. It really is unbelievable how brazen the left is.
First of all, Krapohead is not unemployed because of Trump; he’s unemployed because he’s a crappy quarterback – he went 1-10 in his most recent season, yikes! – who will be a PR nightmare for any team that hires him.
Secondly, he was unemployed months before Trump called out the NFL for coddling these privileged little drama queens. Latest SJW narrative: Trump has a time machine! Fuck, but these people are desperate.
Thirdly, to turn a football game into a political event, as Krapohead did when he protested the anthem, and then whine that the President is engaging in politics, is vomit-inducingly hypocritical. God, but SJWs are such sick, sub-human little fucks. No normal human being could manage that level of hypocrisy. It’s like the old joke about the guy who murders his parents, then begs the judge for leniency on the grounds that he’s an orphan. The sheer brazen assholery and hypocrisy of these people just defies belief.
But it gets worse: His lawyer actually said this: “If the NFL (as well as all professional sports leagues) is to remain a meritocracy, then…” FUCK! Krapohead’s the one who made it about politics, not on-field performance, asshole! Now he’s saying that it should be a meritocracy, that is, only about how well he plays! Fucking fuck!!! It practically overloads the mind’s ability to grasp this level of shamelessness! I’m gonna blow a circuit. The whole sentence, omitting an aside about the owners, is: “If the NFL (as well as all professional sports leagues) is to remain a meritocracy, then principled and peaceful political protest… should not be punished.” In other words, “It should be solely about performance, so you should let my client make it about something other than performance.” Un. Fucking. Believable.
Of course, it’s also deeply amusing that a guy with a record of 1-10 would dare to talk about meritocracy in the first place.
BONUS: Krapohead wasn’t cut loose from the SF 49ers. He walked away from his contract with them last year, LOL!
I suspect his lawyer, one Mark Geragos, is thinking, “Well, I’ll take this moron’s money if he wants.”
There’s a legal analysis by Michael McCann at msn.com in the last day or two. (No link, sorry. The Internet is your friend.) Summary: It is, of course, hopeless for the dickhead.
All this makes one think of H. L. Mencken, that man who loved the spectacle of morons being moronic in public. He should be around these days. He’d flense these fucking idiots until they screamed.
“In 2015, Kaepernick… finished the season with 1,615 yards passing, six passing touchdowns, five interceptions and 256 rushing yards with one rushing touchdown.”
Holy shizznit, seriously? Only one more passing touchdown than interception? Why the fuck is anyone even talking about this guy? Even if you count his rushing touchdown, the story is, “Hire Colin Kaepernick! He’ll get you 7 touchdowns and 5 interceptions!” LOL. Give up, you pathetic loser.
From the useful site https://www.pro-football-reference.com/players/K/KaepCo00.htm, his career regular-season record was 28-30, so he’s a proven NON-winner. But the career record masks the deterioration over time: In the 2014 season his record was 8-8. In the 2015 season, it was 2-6. In 2016… wait for it… 1-10.
Ugh. Untouchable. In his three most recent years, he’s 11-24. So his winning percentage is 11/(11+24) = 31.4%. He’s won less than a third of his games! And his most recent year, less than a tenth of them! Hire Colin Krapohead, and YOU can have the privilege of a quarterback who wins 1/11 = nine percent of his games. And he’s saying coaches don’t want to hire him because politics or racism or whatever. Unreal. The delusionality is strong in this one.
Eugene Volokh has an extended quote from a letter by two House Democrats, Bonnie Watson Coleman and Emanuel Cleaver, to Jack Dorsey, CEO of Twitter:
************ Quote from the letter begins ************
We are disturbed by the ease in which foreign actors were able to manipulate your platform to advance anti-American sentiments that both exacerbates [sic] racial tension and ultimately threatens our democracy. More importantly, we are disappointed by the silence from you and others in your industry on ways to counter such blatant manipulation of this medium to build racial animosity, the consequences of which are quite literally life threatening.
As federal representatives for the men and women most harshly affected by the consequences of your irresponsibility, we urge you to clearly outline: 1) what efforts you have made to detect these accounts and actions you have employed to eliminate racially divisive communications from your networks, 2) what security features you have in place to prevent foreign entities from meddling in our election process, 3) and what reporting process you have to inform the government and the public on the number, nature and impact of these problematic accounts.
Additionally, we are concerned that insufficient government oversight over your firm is inadvertently leading to deeper racial divisions and threats to our democracy. If Twitter continues to prove unable or hesitant to grasp the seriousness of this threat and combat the racialized climate that is being stimulated on your platforms, we, as Members of Congress, will be left with little option but to demand for increased regulations and government oversight of this industry to address these problems.
************ Quote ends ************
You gotta love the assertion that Twitter’s Orwellian “Trust and Safety Council” doesn’t have enough leftists doing censorship. God, leftists are brazen. You also gotta love the spectacle of Democrats suddenly feigning concern about people expressing “anti-American sentiments.”
Anyway, if I were Dorsey I’d respond by posting an open letter on Twitter that says,
Look, I understand that you’re worried about your political futures and feeling a need to play to your base. But by calling for censorship, you’re openly admitting that your base is people who like censorship. This is an astonishing misstep on your part, but thank you for making it.
Foreigners speaking is not “meddling in our election process.” But thank you for that, too… because you have now publicly conceded that foreigners interfering in US elections is a bad thing. Did you mean to concede that?
Since you are, or pretend to be, concerned about that, how about implementing tough measures to prevent non-citizens from voting in US elections – which really is foreigners meddling in our election process.
I’ll think about restricting foreigners’ speech… after you and other Democrats call for, and successfully implement, measures to stop foreigners from actually voting in our elections.
Barring further idiocy, this will be my second-to-last post on the NFL’s recent idiocy.
So a bunch of black NFL players have been trying to turn the National Conversation to the topic of violence. Dear Lord, REALLY? Are you guys seriously that fucking stupid? I always thought the image of dumb jocks was just an invidious stereotype. Maybe there’s something to it.
OK, dickheads, wish granted.
What fraction of white cops have killed a black man?
What fraction of NFL players have committed a violent crime?
If I support the NFL, I guess I’m supporting physical assault. I wouldn’t want to do that! Better not have anything to do with the NFL.
This site was down due to “extreme traffic” on September 26, 2017. I’ll bet. All of a sudden, American fans have had their attention called to the fact that NFL players are claiming to be angels. Seriously, fuckwits?
I don’t usually cite HuffPo, unless it’s for a laugh, but since NFL players are now claiming to be morally perfect little angels who are entitled to lecture everyone else:
Why Aren’t We Talking About What This Study Discovered About NFL Violence?
Researchers have found that NFL players get arrested for violent crimes more often than 20- and 30-something men.
HuffPo also notes that this understates things, because the study only counted arrests while the player was on an NFL roster, and the average NFL career is only 6 years. In contrast, the comparison group, men in their 20s and 30s, has no such limitation; it spans 20 years.
(So the disparity would go the other way if NFL players weren’t especially violent, by a factor of 20/6 = 3.33. I.e., NFL player are more than three times as likely to commit violent crimes as the general male population in that age group.)
Look, if even The Huffington Post can’t stomach the bullshit of your left-wing cause, it’s time to re-think.
Contrary to the Black Lives Matter narrative, the police have much more to fear from black males than black males have to fear from the police. In 2015, a police officer was 18.5 times more likely to be killed by a black male than an unarmed black male was to be killed by a police officer.
Black males have made up 42 percent of all cop-killers over the last decade, though they are only 6 percent of the population. That 18.5 ratio undoubtedly worsened in 2016, in light of the 53 percent increase in gun murders of officers — committed vastly and disproportionately by black males.
Maybe talking about disparities in murder rates by race isn’t the way to go here, assholes.
Via The Rational Male: Feminist Sheryl Sandberg (of “Lean in” fame) admits that PUAs are right about the nice guys versus jerks thing:
When looking for a life partner, my advice to women is date all of them: the bad boys, the cool boys, the commitment-phobic boys, the crazy boys. But do not marry them. The things that make the bad boys sexy do not make them good husbands.
Of course, she quickly reverts to standard feminist form:
When it comes time to settle down, find someone who wants an equal partner. Someone who thinks women should be smart, opinionated and ambitious. Someone who values fairness and expects or, even better, wants to do his share in the home. These men exist and, trust me, over time, nothing is sexier.
At the end she couldn’t resist a parting shot of standard feminist BS, so she says that women find men who “value fairness” sexy.
Overall, though, it’s interesting and encouraging that even feminists now admit that the playahs were totally right all along about the bad boys thing. (I use the plural “feminists” because Sandberg isn’t the only one who has admitted this.) Though I imagine it’s not politically correct in feminist circles to phrase it as, “the playahs were totally right.” Of course, the accusations of misogynist women-hating rape ideology will not cease, even as feminists say the same things. Orwell was not exaggerating about double-think.
I now present to the world my Romance novel written with Red Pill theory in mind.
Title: Ashley and the tall, muscular, preselected leader-of-men tough guy who’s gruff at first and used to be a thug/criminal with a rap sheet, but turns out to be misunderstood and is now reformed (due to our heroine’s appearance in his life!!!), secretly more wealthy than you’d think construction dude
Short title: Canonical Female Porn Romance novel
Ashley looked out the window. The construction crew was generating a skull-splitting quantity of noise, ripping up the sidewalk with a jackhammer at 6:30 in the morning! (Something about the word “jackhammer” made Ashley a little warm, but she couldn’t quite figure out why. Never mind.)
“Can’t believe it,” she muttered darkly. She threw on her bathrobe and strode purposefully out the door, slamming it to announce her presence. (Something about the word “slamming” made Ashley a little warm, but she couldn’t quite figure out why. Never mind.) She was a strong, decisive, modern woman, and she’d show those construction workers who was boss!
The slamming of the door hadn’t been heard over the sound of the jackhammer. She was forced to walk up to the man operating it and tap him on the shoulder.
He switched off the jackhammer, turned to Ashley, and removed his ear protectors. “Yeah, what?”
“That device is keeping me from sleeping!” Ashley said. “And probably the rest of the neighborhood too!”
“Sorry, miss,” he said. “Gotta do the job.” He put his ear protectors back on and turned back to the jackhammer. She tapped his shoulder before he could start it up again. He turned back and removed the protectors. “What?” His tone was annoyed.
“Sleep,” Ashley repeated. “Sleeeeeeeeeeeeeeeep. It’s something humans need. Didn’t your alien overlords tell you that before they sent you here?”
He put his protectors back on. “I’m sorry, miss, but you’ll have to file a complaint with the…” the rest of his reply was lost as he had already turned away and started the jackhammer up again before he had finished.
All right, that’s enough. If I were going to actually write this, which I don’t intend to do any time soon, I’d have it go something like this:
1. Boss of the construction crew comes over and asks Ashley the problem; she tells him. He orders the jackhammer dude to turn it off and do something else. (Leader of men.)
2. However, his behavior toward Ashley is gruff, uninterested, and a little irritated. (Jerky. Plus, uninterested: the girl has to win the guy over.)
3. Ashley tries to go back inside and realizes that she accidentally locked herself out of her apartment when she slammed the door. Thus she looks “charmingly dorky.” (Chicks think “charmingly dorky” is an actual thing. They picture themselves as Meg Ryan or Winona Ryder in one of those shriekingly boring “cute” RomComs from the 1990s. Women! Fuck! [Sorry, ladies. I’m not lactose-intolerant, but sometimes entertainment for women is so cheesy that my reaction makes me feel like I am. The point being, that women make me fart. No, that’s not the point. The point is, God, the cheesiness!]) This auto-lockout on Ashley’s part lets the construction boss – Mike HardPec – do something clever to open the door, thus revealing that he used to be a thief. (Bad boy bad boy bad boy bad boy bad boy ZOMG all hands on clit deck!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!)
4. Over the next few days, it turns out that a few other construction dudes are totally attracted to Ashley, but she is not interested in them. (A woman loves the idea of lots of men wanting her but unable to have her. This contrasts with a man, who wants lots of women to want him so he can go ahead and bang them all.)
5. One morning some dude tries to mug Ashley as she leaves for work, but Mike HardPec beats him up. (Tough guy.)
6. The next evening Ashley sees Mike HardPec in a dive near her house, Mike having gone there for a beer after working on her street. He has a hot babe sitting on his lap (social proof/preselection) when Ashley walks in. The babe is physically perfect in every way but for some reason Mike doesn’t seem that interested in her, at least after he notices ASHLEY WALK IN!!!!!!!!!! ZOMG!!! Ashley would never enter such a low-quality establishment in the normal course of events. (She does, however, have an occasional drink in an expensive, “classy” bar frequented by high-priced lawyers and hedge fund billionaires and so forth, where Ashley goes with her group of three girlfriends, just to get out of the house, mind you, not to put themselves in the proximity of high-socioeconomic-status men, though such men come on to Ashley ALL THE TIME, which she, mind you, just finds tiresome.) Tonight, however, Ash has to go to the dive because they also sell, let’s say, anal dildos. NO!!! Because they also sell Coke and Ashley needs some caffeine to finish the project that…
7. …Her TOTAL BITCH of a boss is making her do faster than is reasonable. Ashley is of course going to defeat this enraging manifestation of intra-sexual competition by the end of the novel. Ash is also going to get a promotion out of it somehow. Also, the bitch boss’s boyfriend is going to totes fall for Ashley, even though Ash has done absolutely NOTHING to encourage this, because she’s such a nice, demure girl, and by the way, is totally not a slut. Rather, the bitch boss’s boyfriend just can’t help himself because Ash is so totes hot. Thus BitchBoss is humiliated as well as defeated.
8. Meanwhile, Ashley’s ex-boyfriend, who is a quintillionaire, is still pining for Ashley. She broke up with him a few months ago. Note SHE broke up with HIM. It was because he was too possessive, because Ashley is so, so desirable. Her ex is tall, good-looking, and well-built, but somehow he just can’t find another woman and forget about Ashley. It’s almost as if Our Heroine is forced to choose between two attractive men!!! Which will she choose? WHICH WILL SHE CHOOSE!?!?!?!?!?!?!?
9. In the end she chooses SURPRISE!!! Mike HardPec. Mike explains that when he was acting all angry and standoffish back in Chapter Ten, it was merely because Ashley is so very attractive that it confused him – he felt like he was losing control of his emotions, it was just so overwhelming how desirable Ashley is – so he freaked out and had to get away from Ashley. But because Ash is so totes awesome in every way, he has now gotten over his committmentaphobia and wants to spend the rest of his life with her.
(Note to women: Men don’t really behave like this. If you’re hot, then I’m going to bang you. It’s simple. “But mightn’t a girl be so overwhelmingly—” Nope. Not after a man is experienced enough to know what to do. (A twelve-year-old boy might get freaked out because he doesn’t know what to do about that chick that has a crush on him. But that’s about lack of experience; different thing.) “But shouldn’t there be complications and dramatic—” No. If you look like Greta Buz and you’re ready to go, then I’m ready to go. I speak for 100% of heterosexual men here. “But you can’t actually speak for 100% of heterosexual men.” Yeah, actually, I can.)
And as they drive off in his million-dollar Ferrari, he explains that he has a lot of money due to inheriting it from a wealthy relative who has died.
Who was a duke in some European country, so Mike now bears that title.
And he finally confesses to her that he’s in a rock band, which is why he had to sneak off all those times – it was for concerts, not to cheat on Ash.
Also, he confesses that he’s a vampire and so has supernatural powers.
I am definitely NOT releasing this into the public domain. Someday maybe I’ll write it and make a shintillion dollars. (A shintillion is a bazillion to the tenth power.)
Reposting this today because it’s October first, a good date to put up stuff about skating. If your local rink isn’t open for the season yet, they will be soon. I think I’ll repost this every year on Oct. 1 (until I forget or get bored).
Aright, bitches, ’tis the season, so listen up.
Ice skating is awesome. When you’re going fast it is the closest a human being can get to flying. The American Psychiatric Association defines “not liking ice skating” as a mental disorder. It’s in their diagnostic manual.
I always see a lot of n00bs ice skating, which is great! Here are some tips.
(1) You will fall. Get used to it.
(2) Ice skating is not walking on ice. The physics is different.
When you walk, you push backward with one foot. (See Figure 1.) If your foot has good traction on the ground, it can’t slip back, though, so instead you are pushed forward. (Newton’s third law of motion, “Every action has an equal and opposite reaction.”)
You cannot do this on ice skates, padawan, because you are on a blade that’s like a sixth of an inch thick. If you push your foot straight back, there is not enough area of the blade making contact with the ice to produce good traction. (See Figure 2.) Instead of being planted on the ice and thus propelling you forward, your foot will simply slide back. Then, because you’re a n00b, you’ll fall down. (Newton’s lesser-known fourth law of motion, “N00bs fall down.”)
How do you deal with this? Well, plainly you need more area of the blade making contact with the ice. Simply turning your foot somewhat sideways does it. (See Figure 3.) This gives your foot enough traction, so when you push it back, the only thing that can happen is that the rest of you goes forward.
Meanwhile you are pointing the other foot in roughly the direction you want to go, so you glide forward on that foot. (As per Newton’s fifth law, “Ice is slippery.”)
Then the feet switch roles, with the gliding foot becoming the foot you’re pushing back with, and the pushing foot becoming the gliding foot. Repeat.
Once you learn this, it really is easy and natural.
(3) On falling: One of the problems is that your instincts about righting yourself when you’re off balance are all wrong. Moves that help you regain your balance when you’re on terra firma don’t necessarily help you, to put it mildly, when you’re skating on blades on ice. You have to learn new reflexes (if learned reflexes isn’t an oxymoron). I can’t re-wire your neural wiring that handles these reflexes, so I don’t know what to tell you here, except that you have to practice.
(4) “Crossover,” logically enough, is the term for when you cross one foot over the other. You’ve seen this: It’s that thing a skater does where it seems like his feet are moving independently of the direction his body is traveling in, so it looks like he’s moonwalking or something.
Crossovers function best when you’re turning at high speed and really leaning into the turn. You do this naturally when you turn while running on ground, but when you do that your foot is planted. When you’re skating, in contrast, you continue to glide on that foot as you shift your weight into the turn, so that for a moment the foot is actually moving in a different direction from your body’s center of mass.
Crossovers are a great way to add speed with relatively little effort, because gravity is doing some of the work for you. When you change direction you lean in the direction you want to go in. So you start to fall in that direction. Before you fall very far, though, you put a foot out under yourself so you glide in that direction instead of falling.
By the way, when you take a turn with a fast series of crossovers, it actually is as fun as it looks. Hell, it’s much more fun. There’s a power and smoothness that is like nothing else. Cf. comment above, in re: “flying.”
(5) Control: As long as you’re not going too fast, turning is so easy that it’s practically subliminal. (No crossovers for the moment; I’m not talking about that level of speed.) What is actually going on, of course, is that you’re shifting your weight ever so slightly in the direction you want to go in. But it feels like you’re just thinking yourself into changing direction. Telekinesis!
(6) Efficiency: Another way you can tell n00bs, even after they’ve learned to not fall much, is by how much energy they waste. In extreme cases it looks like they’re expending half again as much energy as they need to per foot-pound of work accomplished.
If this is you, don’t worry; this takes care of itself over time. Your body’s natural reluctance to waste energy will quickly make you adjust so that your motion is economical.
(7) Stopping. Several n00bs at rinks have asked me for advice, particularly about how to stop.
The correct answer is: Stopping is for the weak and timid! Are you a wuss!? Are you!? Huh!? Good, I didn’t think so. Let’s have no more nonsense about stopping.
If you insist, though, you can just point yourself at a wall. That usually works.
All kidding aside: There are basically two ways to slow yourself down, and if you keep slowing long enough you’ll stop.
The first I call the two-feet method: Just point your skates toward each other, while keeping your legs stiff so your feet don’t actually come together. If your feet bump into each other you’ll fall, obviously. But if you hold your feet apart at that angle, the blades will scrape against the ice, slowing you. And if you keep doing it, stopping you.
You can feel and hear the scraping, at least if you’re not at a rink where they constantly blast fucking country music over the sound system at full volume, what the actual fuck, not that I’m complaining or anything, but what the fuck? Don’t they know that playing that shit voids the warranty on your speaker system? Anyway…
The second method of stopping is the much-admired “hockey stop.” That’s the one you think of when I say “how to stop,” where they turn sideways and kick up ice shavings.
Just turn sideways and dig the blade of your leading foot into the ice. You’re also using your trailing foot, of course, but more for balance than friction, at least the way I do it (YMMV). Also, you’re doing some rapid adjustment of your balance, naturally.
When you first try this you’re going to think, “I shall now attempt a hockey stop.” That’s well and good, but you learn faster if you just think, “Shit! I need to stop!” and imagine what you’d do if you really needed to stop suddenly. This makes it more instinctive and less cerebral.
(8) Sharpness matters so your blades dig in. You need this (a) for acceleration, so your pushing foot can bite into the ice, (b) to slow yourself and stop, and (c) to execute a crossover. (Probably for six other reasons that I’m not thinking of at the moment too.) When you’re doing a crossover, the gliding foot has to bite into the ice to a certain extent or the foot will just slide out from under you. This happened to me once when I was trying to take too steep an angle with my gliding foot. Foot shot backward, rest of body went, “Hello, ice!”
The blade has some thickness; it’s not a knife blade. It’s the blade’s edges that are sharp. Once I actually drew blood from my hand accidentally with the edge. But that was probably right after they’d been sharpened; normally blades aren’t that sharp.
(A) Little kids on the ice are cute, but DANGER DANGER DANGER!!! Partly this is because they can’t control themselves yet, and partly because even the ones who can control themselves have no social awareness whatsoever. If they see Mom over there, they will simply turn with no warning in that direction, and if you’re behind them you’re going to be doing some fancy dancing to not hit them. This leads to hilarity and occasional bruises, because of course you’re going to steer yourself into a wall or shift so that you fall, instead of plowing into a little kid.
I recently cracked my elbow into the wall of a rink because I had to dodge a little one who seemed to execute a right-angle turn right in front of me with no warning. I had to do something to avoid smashing into him and ended up saying Hi to the plexi-glass. He didn’t even realize it had happened, but I did get a sympathetic look from someone on the other side of the glass.
They can also turn quite suddenly because their centers of gravity are so low. It’s like they’re equipped with little inertialess drives.
Just remember this:
Little kids on ice = Brownian motion + inertialess drives.
(B) Use your ears as well as your eyes to help maintain awareness of other skaters in your vicinity. Thus you can avoid pulling a “little kid” and turning suddenly just when someone’s coming up behind you.
Caveat: In the corners of the rink, noise bounces around weirdly. Sometimes it sounds like someone is coming up behind you and just about to smash into you. You’re like “Gah!” but when you look around there’s no one within ten yards.
(C) Downhill skating. Sweet! But why didn’t they have this when I was 19? You kids today don’t know how good you have it, let me tell you, when I was your age I had to skate 40 miles to school, and it was uphill both ways! By God!
(D) This is a politically incorrect blog, so an observation about the sexes. Normal people, continue to read; shrieking feminist shrikes, go somewhere else (permanently).
Still with me? OK, a fun observation:
All good skaters have both power and grace, strength and fluidity. But there is a difference between good female skaters and good male skaters. Good female skaters have power – you can’t be a good skater without it – but they have more grace compared to male skaters. And good male skaters have grace – you can’t be a good skater without that, either(*) – but they have more power compared to female skaters. Just a nice little “the world is gendered” observation to affirm normality and freak out the screaming SJWs.
If you’re like most people, i.e. psychologically normal, you understand (there was a time when no one denied this!) that the sexes are different and that the differences, in so many ways, can be a source of delight to everyone. This is just a small example of that.
* Even the most brutal hockey player, 190 pounds of muscle and missing three front teeth, who starts throwing jabs at the slightest provocation, has grace on the ice. If you don’t believe me, Youtube is your friend.
(10) Have fun!
UPDATE: DON’T TEXT OR TAKE SELFIES WHILE SKATING! FUCKING RETARDS!